Dan Avidan Oneshots
by skywasmadeofamethyst
Summary: Just a collection of oneshots about Dan Avidan. There will be fluff, smut, and maybe even angst I don't know. This is just a place to dump my oneshots. #DanAvidan #GameGrumps
1. Our Family

Dan sat back on the sofa holding her close against him doing his best to keep his eyes focused on her chattering and the coloring book open in between them. It was times like this that he was still astounded by how tiny she was. She was so delicate sitting cradled against him, even with his lanky frame.

Her dark hair was pulled up into a high ponytail most likely done by her mother this morning. Katrina had even taken the care to tie the ponytail with bright yellow ribbon; Iris' favorite color. Iris had her mother's eyes; that big pretty hazel Dan had fallen for the second he'd caught sight of them.

Iris favored her mother quite a bit actually. They both had that pale soft skin. They both had a heart-shaped face and a sweet little smile. It was clear that the little girl would grow up to be just as gorgeous as Katrina.

Dan Avidan had never imagined he'd fall for a woman with a child. He'd always assumed dating a single mom would just be too dramatic. There was so much to consider when there were kids involved. It wasn't just about you and your girlfriend, there was a third party to consider, one who was so fragile and needy. Kids were pretty much just along for the ride when it came to one of their parents dating after all. Not to mention you'd probably have to deal with an ex husband and all the fuss and stress that would come along with that kind of situation.

Here Dan was though cuddling a six-year-old girl who along with her mother had come to mean the world to him. He ignored his exhaustion knowing he couldn't give into sleep just yet.

He had been so busy lately with the Grumps and working on writing the next Ninja Sex Party album. He was running on empty most of the time. He was ashamed to admit it but Katrina and Iris had taken a backseat to his career lately.

Dan knew he had to make up for lost time. He had to remind them that they were still the reason he woke up every morning. They needed to be reminded that he would always try his best to put them both first, even if hadn't been doing a great job at that lately.

Despite his fatigue Dan couldn't stop the smile from spreading across his cheeks as little Iris let out an excited gasp pointing down at the coloring book page. "Look Danny, it's a Tric—a Tricear—a Triceratops!"

Dan chuckled nodding his head unable to stop the swell of pride from taking over his heart. He'd been the one to teach her all about dinosaurs. He'd taken her down to the museum to show her the dinosaur bones the year before and she'd been obsessed since then.

Dan had even bought her a little yellow shirt with a Triceratops on it. It was her favorite dinosaur after all. He would be lying though if he'd tried to say he hadn't been tempted to buy her a custom Iris-Saur t-shirt to match with his own Danny-Saur t-shirt.

He had made a big point of sharing all the things he loved with little Iris. It had been his way of trying to bond with her. He wanted to show her all the things he'd loved when he was her age; Lite-Brites and dinosaurs.

He'd sang for her more than once and played her all his favorite records. He had even encouraged her to sing along with him. He had wanted to instill a love of music into her, to pass his passion for music on to her.

He'd made sure to read the Last Unicorn to her more than once and had shown her the movie as well. She had taken to asking him to read the Last Unicorn to her when she was sick and he did it every time without complaint.

He'd even watched football with her. He had taken to trying to teach her about sports and was relieved that she wasn't bored out of her mind by it.

He knew that Iris didn't quite understand every single thing about football not fully, but still she cheered and clapped when he cheered. She would even boo when he was annoyed by a bad play or any team other than the Giants scoring a point.

To this day Dan was still shocked by just how easy it had been for him to bond with Iris. He wasn't afraid to say that he loved her like she was his own. It was a shock for him to admit.

Of course, he did love kids. He doted on his nephews and he was equally as prone to spoil Brian's daughter Audrey. He had never pictured himself being someone's father figure though. He had never imagined himself being someone's stepfather.

Any time he thought about having kids he had always framed it as being something that would happen in the distant future. Even as he grew older he still would claim that he wasn't ready to have kids just yet. He always said having kids could wait, he had to meet the right girl first after all.

It seemed though that for Dan the right girl had come with the right kid.

Dan pressed a kiss to Iris' cheek causing her to giggle as the stubble he'd failed to shave rubbed against her round cheek. He spoke unable to stop himself from purposely tickling her again with his scruff. "What color are you going to color it Shortie?"

Iris giggled the little nickname Dan had deposited on her always making her laugh. "Blue…Teal Blue."

"Ah good choice. That's Danny's favorite color." Dan praised her as he watched her fish out a teal crayon from the massive box of crayons he may or may not have bought her along with an equally massive stack of coloring books and art pads.

Iris nodded her head a smile on her face as she began to neatly color the page. "I'm gonna color it blue and yellow so it'll be both our favorite colors."

"What about Mommy? Are you going to color something her favorite color?" Dan asked trying not to chuckle at how slowly she colored.

She wasn't like most kids her age. She was so serious when it came to coloring. She made sure to move slow and stay in the lines. She was so careful. Iris was so creative and it astounded the crap out of Dan.

The wall at his office back at the Grump Space had been decorated with little framed drawings Iris had given him. He had gone out and bought the frames himself at a local thrift shop. He was so proud of the little drawings. Iris took such great care in creating them and Dan wanted to show them off.

Ross of course teased Dan, trying to decipher what some of the drawings were supposed to be even if he could clearly see it. He would point at the drawings and ask Dan if a dinosaur was a flamingo or if a dog was a lion.

Of course, Dan would always just tell Ross to shut up and not be jealous that he didn't have such awesome art in his own office.

Dan smiled as Iris nodded her head answering him. "I'm gonna color that bird red for Mommy. She likes red. She likes apple red."

Dan continued to watch her color soaking in the little moment. A tall stack of coloring books sat out on the coffee table and Dan found that he wouldn't mind if he had to sit here for hours watching her color a page from each book.

Dan might have taken to spoiling Iris just a tiny bit even if Katrina did scold him for it. Katrina would always point out that spoiling her daughter was cute now but he wouldn't find it so cute when she was a teenager pouting that they had bought her an old clunker of a car instead of a brand-new car.

Dan knew Katrina was right of course, but he couldn't stop himself from buying things for Iris. It wasn't anything expensive of course, just little stuffed animals and lots of art supplies. Iris really liked art and Arin had told Dan it was probably a good idea to support her in her interests early on. She might be able to do something with art once she was an adult if she kept at it.

Arin and Suzy were almost as bad about dropping the art supplies on Iris, Dan was always quick to point this out when Katrina gave him that little look of mild disapproval after he'd come home with yet another coloring book.

Dan grinned as Iris spoke her voice growing even more excited as she pointed at the page beside the one she was currently coloring. She had spotted what she knew was Dan's all-time favorite dinosaur. "Look Danny it's a Steggysaurous."

Dan failed to stop himself from laughing as he corrected her "Stegosaurus Shortie. It's called a Stegosaurus."

"Oh." She replied making Dan feel a little bad for laughing.

She was a sensitive kid almost to the point of being far too sensitive and sobbing at the drop of a hat. Kids at school teased her for it. They called her a crybaby and picked on her until she cried. Dan could remember how pissed off he'd been when Iris had come home crying over the cruel name. He had marched down to the elementary school himself and demanded that something be done about it.

He was shocked at times how protective he felt over the child. He just loved her so much. He hated the idea of some snot-nosed little brat making her cry.

Katrina was pretty overly sensitive as well. So was he though; quick to cry when he felt upset. He guessed that was part of why it had been so easy for them to mesh together as a family of sorts.

He pressed a serious of kisses to her cheeks doing all he could to soothe any hurt feelings. "It's okay Shortie when I was your age I couldn't say S's so I would call it a thegotharuth."

Dan was relieved that this little fact caused Iris to burst out laughing. He couldn't stop himself from laughing along with her.

He teased her purposely rubbing his stubble against her cheeks only causing her to giggle more. "Are you laughing at me Shortie?"

"Nu huh." Iris exclaimed as he continued to tickle her adding his fingers into the mix tickling her ribs.

"Liar liar pants on fire." Dan teased his heart melting as she continued to giggle squirming against him as he tickled her tiny frame and her round cheeks.

…..

Katrina stood in the kitchen a smile forming across her face as she listened to her fiancé interact with her daughter. It was times like this that she was almost overwhelmed with just how much she loved Dan.

Leigh Daniel Avidan had been the last thing in the world Katrina Cassel had been looking for when they'd met at that Halloween party two years before.

Dan was older than her, almost by a decade. He was a little bit immature at times. He wrote songs about boners and spent his days making jokes about dicks on the internet.

Katrina would be lying if she tried to say that his silly songs didn't make her laugh though. The sound of him singing made her breathless no matter what the subject matter was. His perverted jokes made her giggle even if they were immature. He always found a way to make her drop her need to be serious.

Dan may have not been what Katrina was looking for, but he was everything she wanted and more.

She almost felt anxious when she allowed herself to remember that she had almost backed out of going to Arin's and Suzy's Halloween party two years before.

Katrina had befriended Suzy at a pottery class they'd both been taking. Katrina had been surprised by how quick the friendship had formed. She wouldn't have thought Suzy and she would have anything in common but they did; they both loved Disney and cats and art. They both liked the same bands. They both had similar senses of humor.

So, when Suzy had begged Katrina to come to the Halloween party Arin and she were throwing Katrina had given in and attended. It had been a costume party. It hadn't taken place on Halloween night. Halloween had been on a Monday so the party had taken place on the Saturday before. So that had at least eased some of Katrina's guilt over having to hire a babysitter to watch Iris.

Katrina had thrown together a costume rather quickly. She was a single mom working as a receptionist at a dentist's office. It wasn't Katrina's dream career but it paid the bills. She had to provide for her daughter all alone so she had sacrificed any dreams she may have had at one point and had taken a mind-numbing receptionists job.

She had gone to the party dressed as Little Red Riding Hood. It had been an easy costume to put together. She had a little red knee length dress and matching red ballet flats. She had a straw basket and a red hooded cape styled jacket. She had borrowed one of her daughter's stuffed animals to shove into the basket she had carried; a little brown wolf.

Dan had been the one to notice her. Arin had talked him into dressing in a joint costume. They had chosen to go as Mario and Luigi and Dan had regretted wearing the green overalls and the dumb fake mustache the second he'd caught sight of Suzy's pretty friend.

He had noticed Katrina's curves first. He'd be lying if he tried to deny it. She had a nice figure; heavy breasts and nice full hips. The next thing that had caught his sight was her hair. It was a nice shade of fawn brown. She'd braided her long hair to the side and Dan had wanted to run his fingers through the silky locks. Her eyes had sold him on her. They were a pleasant shade of hazel that he could stare at for an eternity.

Dan had been the one to approach her. He had spent the night trying to charm her.

Katrina had been a little annoyed to be honest. He had spent the night following her around like a tall loud shadow constantly trying to talk to her.

Mostly though she had been shocked. Sure, guys hit on her. They stared at her breasts mostly. They always ran the second they found out she had a kid though.

In her opinion her body showed she had a kid. She had stretch marks and her belly wasn't as flat as she would have hoped it would be. Katrina had always described herself as being chubby. People told her she was pretty, but she didn't see it when she looked in the mirror.

As hard as Katrina had tried to brush off Dan's advances and ignore him, he'd gotten to her. He had a nice smile. He seemed so sweet; so genuine in his compliments. He was funny. He was far taller than her and he was actually pretty handsome if Katrina was to be honest.

He had asked to see her again, to take her to dinner. She had expected him to run when she'd given him her answer. "Okay…but I have something to confess before you commit to wanting to ask me out Dan…I can understand if you back out after hearing this…so. uh here it is, I have a daughter…She's four years old. Her name is Iris…. it's just her and me…my ex, her dad ran off when I got pregnant…I don't really date because most guys can't take it…. Like I said I get it if you aren't interested anymore, but you should know that she is part of my life."

Dan felt like an asshole to admit it but he had almost wanted to run after finding out that Katrina had a kid. His fears and doubts had told him to run. His head had insisted that it was too much to take on. Dating her wouldn't work out. He wouldn't be able to take on a kid.

He had ignored his fears though. His heart had screamed at him to go for it. He liked Katrina. She was sexy and sweet. She was downright adorable. He had a feeling she'd be cute even without the cutesy costume. He wanted to spend more time with her. Her having a child didn't change that.

So, Dan had nodded his head speaking from the heart as he gave her his answer. "Okay. I'm okay with that…. I'm surprised, but I have no problem with you having a daughter. I would really like to take you to dinner….and maybe if you'd let me I wouldn't mind spending more time with you. So, I would really like to take you to dinner next weekend…Outback Steakhouse…if that's okay with you."

And with that Katrina had ignored her own doubts and nodded her head accepting his offer.

The dinner date had led to more dates and Dan and she had fallen for each other. Any chance Katrina had given him to back out he'd refused to take. He had reassured her that he didn't mind her having a child.

He had promised her that he understood that Iris would always be number one in Katrina's life. He had promised her that if he and Iris formed a bond that he wouldn't just drop out of Iris' life. He had promised Katrina that even if she and he broke up that he wouldn't just disappear from Iris' life.

If the little girl formed a bond with him he wouldn't disappear.

Katrina had been terrified to let Dan meet her daughter. She had worried that Dan meeting Iris would make the fact that her daughter existed totally 100 percent real to Dan.

Katrina had been afraid Dan would freak out and run the second he'd met her daughter. Katrina knew that if that happened then she wouldn't follow him.

Dan running away would hurt, but Katrina wouldn't choose him over her child. Her mother had been that kind of person; always tossing Katrina aside for every man that showed her any attention. Katrina had spent her childhood at her grandmother's house and her aunt's house while her mother ran off with whichever boyfriend she had found at the time.

Katrina refused to make the mistakes her mother had made.

She had almost wanted to sob the first time Dan had met Iris. He'd been so perfect. He had dropped down onto his knees to be on Iris' level and he'd spoken to her with the sweetest little voice.

Katrina could so clearly remember his words as he held out his hand for Iris to shake. "Hi Iris. I'm Danny. Your mom has told me a lot about you. I really really like your mom a lot and I'd like to spend some time with you…if that's alright with you."

Iris had taken to Dan so quickly. She adored Dan almost right from the start once she'd overcome her shyness. It had stunned Katrina. Dan and Iris had so easily become two peas in a pod.

Dan was so great with Iris. He was so patient and sweet. He played with her and listened to her when she talked about things she was excited about. Dan doted on Iris like she was a little princess.

Dan hadn't run away no matter how stressful things became. He had stayed through being interrupted in getting close to having sex with Katrina by Iris walking into the room. He had stayed through a sobbing sick Iris vomiting on him when she'd caught the flu the year before. He had stayed there through Iris throwing the occasional temper tantrum when she'd refused naps and was feeling cranky. He had woken up and pulled Iris into bed with Katrina and he when she woke from nightmares.

He had stuck around when Katrina was overworked and exhausted balancing parenting and a crappy job. He had stuck around when Katrina was feeling insecure about her post child body. He had stuck around when Katrina let bad experiences with her ex get the best of her causing her to question Dan's love for her.

He had stayed through everything. He'd stayed glued to Katrina and Iris.

When he'd talked Katrina into quitting the job she hated, and letting him take care of Iris and her for as long as she would let him, she had said yes. When he had asked Katrina and Iris to move in with him Katrina had said yes. When he had proposed the Halloween before Katrina had zero doubts about saying yes.

Katrina jumped ever so slightly being pulled from her own thoughts as she felt a pair of gangly arms embrace her wrapping tight around her waist.

She leaned back against Dan's embrace as he nuzzled her neck his voice drowsy. "I'm so happy to be home early for once. I missed my girls. These past few nights you two have been asleep when I get home and I have to leave before you wake up."

"We missed you too baby." Katrina replied as he continued to nuzzle her neck.

He spoke his voice a bit muffled as he began to press kisses to her neck. "I'm sorry I've been so busy lately. I suck. I haven't been home as much as I should."

Katrina frowned placing down the knife she'd been using to chop veggies. She turned to face him her hands reaching up to caress his cheeks. "You don't suck Dan. I don't like that you haven't been home as much as I would like, I understand why though. Iris and I miss you when you're gone but we know you're gone working on your dreams. We might miss you but we're proud as heck of you."

She spoke again her lips sliding along his in a gentle kiss hoping she was doing a decent job at reassuring him. "The only thing that sucks is that I worry about you overworking yourself. You're so exhausted baby and you keep going until you burn out. I want you to take a break soon okay. Just take a week or two to get some rest…no work or as little work as possible okay. Get some real sleep and relax with Iris and me. Take a break."

Dan sighed wanting to argue with her that he didn't have time for a break. He knew that it would be a lie though. Brian would understand if he needed a week or so to himself to recharge. Brian was probably just as burnt out. And Arin wouldn't have a problem with him coming home as soon as he finished up his recordings for the day.

Arin didn't want him to burn out either after all. Dan was pretty sure Arin had barked out the same orders to take a break to Dan time and time again over the years

Dan nodded his head sinking against Katrina's hold ever so slightly as he relented. "Okay Kat. I'll take a break."

Katrina rewarded his agreement with a serious of kisses to his lips. He smiled into the kiss sinking against her more.

He allowed his hands to caress her curves his voice growing husky as he pulled back from the kisses long enough to speak. "I might need that break to show the future Mrs. Avidan just how much I've missed her. I haven't been taking care of my babygirl the way I should."

"How much you missed me or how much Excalibur missed me?" She teased her voice low enough that only he could hear it.

Dan reacted by giving her backside a playful pat. "Oh it missed you so damn much babygirl. Tonight, I'm going to show you just how much every last bit of me missed you."

Katrina chuckled shaking her head ever so slightly. She had a feeling once he got a good meal in him he'd fall asleep the second his head hit his pillows. They might not be able to express how much they'd missed each other until tomorrow night.

She placed her hand on the base of his neck massaging the tension from him causing a low groan to escape his throat. He spoke his eyes growing heavy. "God, Kat babygirl, you're going to be the death of me."

She giggled removing her hand from his neck causing him to let out a small whine. She pressed a gentle all to chaste kiss to his lips as she spoke up. "I have a surprise for you."

He furrowed his brow reluctantly allowing her to pull away from him. She headed over to the pantry fishing out the rectangular box she'd kept hidden in a reusable grocery bag in the corner.

She was almost stunned Dan hadn't taken notice of the brightly wrapped gift. She had managed to find wrapping paper in the exact shade of blue Dan loved.

Dan felt a brief wash of panic hit him as he stared at the wrapped gift. It was clearly in a clothing box. Why would she buy him clothing? Was he supposed to buy her a gift too? Had he forgotten their anniversary? No that wasn't possible they'd met in October and it was March. So, he hadn't fucked up and forgotten to get her a gift. She more than likely wasn't expecting something in return.

Katrina resisted the urge to laugh at the dumbfounded look on Dan's face as he stared down at the box. She spoke nudging his shoulder gently. "Open it."

Dan made quick work of unwrapping the box his mind going in a million different directions. He felt breathless as he opened the box to reveal what was so clearly paperwork.

He spoke his voice a slight squeak as he hoped he wasn't allowing himself to get his hopes up. "Is this what I think it is?"

Katrina nodded her head hoping he wouldn't be upset she'd been keeping this from him. The paperwork had come in a few days before and she'd wanted to surprise him with it. She had just been waiting for the right moment.

"The lawyer sent it a few days ago…. all we have to do is sign it and he'll file it with the courts." Katrina explained studying Dan's wide eyes as he read the paperwork.

He spoke his throat growing tight hoping he wasn't ruining the moment. "Mitch signed the papers?"

Katrina felt her throat tighten up at the mention of her ex, Iris' father. She had been so terrified he would try to fight her when she had her lawyer track him down and request that he sign away his parental rights.

She was relieved he had no issue signing the paperwork. Katrina guessed she shouldn't have been surprised. He'd made zero effort to pay child support. He hadn't been there when Iris had been born. He had dumped Katrina the second she'd found out she was pregnant.

So of course, he'd have zero problem signing away any parental rights he held to Iris.

If Katrina could have avoided ever having to speak to Mitch again she would have gladly done so. Dan and she needed Mitch to sign away his rights if they wanted to proceed with this though.

Dan nodded his head ignoring the desire to be so pissed off that Mitch had signed away his rights as a father so carelessly. This was what they had wanted. They needed him to sign away his rights so he couldn't try to interfere with what they wanted to do.

"So, all we have to do is sign these papers…and, and it'll be official? She'll be…she'll really be mine?" Dan asked feeling slightly dumbfounded.

The lawyer had explained all of this to Katrina and he a million times, but Dan hadn't allowed himself to get his hopes up. He had been too afraid that his plans would fall through and it would break his heart.

"Yeah once it's filed with the courts…I mean if a judge okays it then It'll be official. She'll be yours." Katrina explained her eyes beginning to water.

She hadn't ever dreamed Dan would have asked her to consider letting him adopt Iris. She had almost wanted to ask him to pinch her when he'd first brought up the idea. She had been almost sure she was having a dream.

It had been real though. Dan had really wanted to adopt Iris.

Dan had been afraid when he'd first brought up the idea of letting him adopt Iris with Katrina. He'd been afraid he would scare her off, or that he'd be coming on too strong.

Katrina and he were getting married though. The wedding was a few months away. Miss. Katrina Angelica Cassel would become Mrs. Katrina Angelica Avidan. Iris would still remain Iris Marie Cassel though.

It didn't feel right to Dan. They were officially becoming a family. Iris was part of that family. Iris should be an Avidan too.

Dan loved Iris. He loved her like she was his own flesh and blood. The realization that he loved her had hit him like a bullet to the head. He wanted to be her father. He wanted her to be Iris Avidan.

The idea of being recognized as her father by the legal system had made him so happy.

Katrina had cried when he'd asked for permission to adopt Iris. He had been so afraid he'd said the wrong thing, that he'd made a mistake. Then Katrina had kissed him though. She had kissed him and asked him if he was sure that this was what he wanted.

Once he'd reassured her that he had wanted this more than anything on the planet Katrina had given him her enthusiastic blessing.

They'd gotten a lawyer and paid a fortune to make this happen. It really was happening now. Once this paperwork was filed Dan would legally be considered Iris' father.

Dan and Katrina broke eye contact as a tiny voice sounded out. "What's goin on? Did Danny open his gift?"

Dan nodded his head his voice cracking as he tried not to burst into happy tears at the sight of Iris. She would be officially his; his daughter.

"Yeah Shortie. I did." He replied placing the box containing the paperwork gently on the kitchen counter.

He dropped to his knees signaling for her to come to him.

Dan felt his throat tighten up as he tried to find the best way to have this conversation with the little girl. What if she didn't want him to be her father? What if she didn't want to be Iris Avidan?

He pushed these fears from his mind as he took her tiny hands in his. "You remember on the first day of school how you had to draw that picture?"

"A picture of my family?" Iris asked it being a clear memory for her.

Dan smiled nodding his head his voice still gentle. "Yeah and you got really sad because that boy told you that I wasn't supposed to be in the picture because I wasn't really your family…that I wasn't your Daddy so I wasn't allowed to be in the picture."

Dan could still remember how pissed off he'd been when Iris had come home sobbing showing him her picture saying that he wasn't allowed to be in her family picture. He'd called the school and raised up a fuss until the kid had begrudgingly been forced to apologize to Iris.

Dan had framed the little picture Iris had drawn and put it in his office at the Grump Space. She had drawn herself and Katrina and their spoiled rotten cat Coco. Dan had dropped his jaw when he'd spotted the fourth stick figure. It was a tall stick figure that was more legs than anything. Iris had taken special care to give the stick figure a mess of massive brown curls on top of it's head; she'd captured Dan's jewfro perfectly in stick figure form.

She'd written names above the little stick figures; Me, Mommy, Coco, and Danny. She had to attach a paper explaining who everyone was and telling a few facts about them.

Danny's fact had been that he loved her Mommy and that he told her about the dinosaurs.

Dan had held a sobbing Iris in his arms and done his best to smooth out the crumbled picture. He could remember the words he'd said to her.

He spoke asking Iris to repeat those words. "Remember what I told you when you were so sad?"

"That we're a family. You might not be my real daddy, but you love me. That you love mommy the way a daddy is supposed to. And that you love me the way a daddy loves his kids." Iris replied a small frown crossing her features.

Dan nodded his head a small nervous smile crossing his features. "Yeah, and you remember how a few months ago we talked about how we were going to try to talk to a judge so you could have my last name?"

Iris nodded her head her eyes beginning to water. Dan held back his panic hoping she was crying tears of joy. He wiped her eyes his voice soft and reassuring. "We're going to talk to that judge, and maybe if the judge says it's okay you're going to have my last name….is that okay with you?"

He received his answer in the form of a tight hug from Iris the child clinging onto him. She pulled back her head nodding rapidly as she spoke. "Does that mean you can be my daddy now?"

Dan felt his voice crack as his eyes began to water. "Yes, it does…if that's okay with you."

"It is." Iris insisted as he embraced her again.

She spoke her voice tiny muffled against his chest as she tested the waters. "I love you daddy."

Dan nodded his head his lips pressing to her forehead his voice filled with complete joy. "I love you too Iris."

Katrina quickly joined the pair on the floor her arms wrapping around them. Dan wrapped an arm around her pulling her in on the hug.

He closed his eyes his lips pressing to Katrina's temple.

They were a family now. This was his family.

He may have never expected to be here, but this was where he was supposed to be.


	2. Soothing Insecurities

Julia couldn't stop the exasperated sigh from leaving her lips as her fiancé shifted in the makeup chair, for the millionth time today, smudging her work. She quickly fetched a tissue from the mirrored table in front of them before blotting at the mistake thankfully erasing it without smudging anything else along the way.

She couldn't help but to gently scold him as she tossed the tissue down. "You know the more you wiggle the longer you're stuck in this chair."

Dan managed to give her an apologetic smile. "Sorry I had an itch….and it's hot."

Julia resisted the urge to roll her eyes at his excuse. She was tempted to ask if he'd had an itch every time he'd wiggled over the course of the long morning he was having in her chair.

"It's probably hot because you're wearing spandex in the middle of the desert. Please promise me you'll drink as much water as you can stand and don't shy away from those fans they have set up outside. I don't want you overheating." She pointed out shaking her head resisting the urge to call him out on his excuses.

Dan sighed nodding his head. "Yeah I know. I promise I will…I don't want heatstroke either. The director insists that the desert is the only place where we can capture a desolate planet like environment though."

Julia resisted the urge to admit she'd rather be back in the warehouse they'd started filming in a few days before, choosing instead to tease him by changing the subject. "If you don't get out of my chair soon you're going to further stall filming. If you stall much longer Brian is totally going to kill you."

"Brian would never murder me." Dan insisted shaking his head rapidly resembling a toddler more than a grown man in his late thirties.

Julia chuckled as he stilled again allowing her to continue applying the purple and blue galaxy themed makeup he'd requested for this music video. "He kills you all the time in the Ninja Sex Party videos babe. I've seen them. I have like a tab counting the amount of people Brian kills. You're usually on that tab."

"That's a weird hobby baby. Brian doesn't kill people though. That's Ninja Brian and Ninja Brian kills everyone. He kills a man every morning before brushing his teeth. He only kills Danny Sexbang for being rude or an idiot. He wouldn't kill me." Dan insisted doing his best to stay still as he presented his argument.

"Did you just call your alter ego an idiot?" Julia teased as she tried to put her finishing touches with the dark blue glittery powder she'd been using. It was easy to get in the wrong place if her subject wasn't totally still.

Dan grinned nodding his head having zero shame in answering her question. "Danny Sexbang is an idiot…. he's a total master of sex though. So, I think we can all forgive him for his lack of insight and book smarts."

Dan paused for a short moment before speaking again not helping but to shimmy his hips ever so slightly even though it came across a bit clumsily in the chair. "The master of sex trait is the only thing Danny and I share."

Julia chuckled relieved she'd pulled back the makeup brush long enough for him to do his little hip shimmy. She spoke as he finally stilled again. "Be careful Avidan, girls aren't into guys with over inflated egos."

Dan grinned tempted to joke that his ego wasn't the only huge thing about him. He was pretty sure Julia had already heard him make this particular dick joke before though. He instead went with his next choice in response. "Good thing I only have one girl to impress then huh?"

Julia giggled shaking her head at this statement. "Yeah and she's soooo impressed."

She chuckled again as Dan spoke his voice a little softer hinting that he was speaking more to himself than her. "Damn straight she is."

Julia shook her head at the ridiculousness of this entire conversation. A few years ago, if someone had told her she'd be standing in a little trailer in the middle of a desert in southern California applying spacey galaxy makeup to her fiancé's face just so he and his bandmate could film a music video for a song titled Rock It into Uranus, she might have assumed the person supplying this information was either crazy or abusing some pretty intense drugs.

It turned out that life was stranger than fiction though.

Dan and she had met two years before in a somewhat similar environment.

Julia Kelling had been hired to do makeup for another one of Dan's projects Starbomb. The band had been filming a music video and she'd been hired on as one of the makeup artists.

Dan could admit that he'd been pretty infatuated by the pretty brunette applying makeup to the model they'd hired to play Princess Peach.

He'd thought Julia was pretty cute. She was beyond cute, she was stunning. Her dark hair was long and thick with the slightest hint of caramel highlights. Her eyes were a dark brown that made Dan automatically think of milky chocolate.

The sugary little descriptions had only matched the sweetness of her personality.

Being a hot blooded male Dan had of course taken notice of her curves. She was a little chubby but Dan hadn't really noticed. If anything, he found himself a little more than entranced by her body. He would later tease her insisting that he'd noticed her boobs before anything else though that hadn't been exactly true.

Her accent had been the main thing that had captured Dan's attention. It had taken him a moment to place it, but it had hit him that it had to be Louisianan.

Needless to say, Dan had been Julia's long before she'd even realized it.

Arin being the observant shitstirring friend that Dan loved had practically shoved Dan into Julia's makeup chair insisting that Julia put shimmery silver eyeliner on Dan.

Dan could admit that he'd maybe talked Julia's head off when he'd been shoved into that makeup chair. Thankfully Julia hadn't seemed to mind his chattiness easily chatting right back at him.

By the end of the day Arin had once again practically shoved Dan to Julia insisting that if Dan didn't ask her out then Arin would do it for him.

Dan had asked Julia to get a bite to eat and she'd surprised him by actually saying yes. The date had gone well. It had gone great actually.

Dan had discovered that Julia was in fact from Louisiana, a Parish called Lafayette. Dan had been amused to discover that Julia's father was actually originally from New Jersey. He'd been amused to discover that Julia knew something about football given her father was actually a bigger Giants fan than Dan.

Dan had also discovered Julia and he had a similar sense of humor as well. He had discovered that they both shared a love for fantasy and a love for music.

Needless to say, that one date had led to many other dates and a relationship.

The year before Julia had taken Dan to meet her family in Louisiana. Dan could admit he'd been anxious. Julia's family lived outside of the city, out near the swamps.

All Dan had been able to picture was Julia's family feeding him to some gator simply for the crime of being a tall geeky Jewish Yankee from New Jersey.

His fears had been all for nothing though. Her family actually had seemed to like him though they had tried to feed Dan all too much rich spicy food which had made his sensitive stomach rather unhappy. They had maybe taken a little bit too much joy teasing him for being from New Jersey never mind the fact that Julia's father was from New Jersey as well. Julia's father had really liked Dan thanks to Dan's love of sports and probably the fact that Dan was a fellow Jersey Boy.

By the time Julia's family had dropped Dan and she off at the airport Dan had made up his mind. Once they'd made it back to the little rental house they shared together both Dan and Julia tired from the long trip, Dan had taken Julia by shock by dropping to his knee and proposing.

He had of course had to run to the bedroom to fetch the ring he'd been hiding on the top shelf of his closet for months now, but all and all the proposal had been accepted by a stunned Julia.

When Dan had taken Julia to New Jersey to meet his family for Hanukkah Julia had an engagement ring on her finger and an excited Avidan family to meet.

Julia tried to stop the irritated huff from leaving her lips as Dan fidgeted again almost causing her to make another mistake.

Her irritation melted as Dan gave her an all too innocent smile. "Sorry. I swear I'm not doing it on purpose."

"Somehow I don't believe that." Julia remarked trying hard to get the final touches done on his face before she had an annoyed director asking what was taking them so long.

Dan grinned unable to stop himself. "It's the truth. I'm totally not stalling your progress just so I can have your glorious boobs directly in front of my face for just a little longer."

"You do know I'm right at the perfect angle to jab a makeup brush into your eye, right?" Julia replied a hint of a smile on her lips.

Dan let out an overdramatic gasp shaking his head. "You wouldn't blind the father of your child."

Julia chuckled ever so slightly as Dan reached out placing a gentle hand over the slight bump along her belly rubbing it gently as he spoke. "Tell your mommy to be nice to your daddy. He doesn't want to be blind."

The pregnancy had been a shock. She'd worried that Dan would be upset at first. They hadn't been planning this. They had actually wanted to wait at least a year so they could enjoy being newlyweds before they began to start a family.

Dan had stunned her by being over the moon though. He'd called everyone, and that did mean everyone. He'd made midnight phone calls to everyone in his address book announcing the news ignoring the fact that most of the people he'd called had been drowsy messes when he'd dropped the 'I'm going to be a daddy!' news on them.

Dan reluctantly pulled his hand back as Brian stuck his head into the trailer his eyes the only thing visible through his ninja get up. Those eyes rolled Brian's voice monotone. "You better get on set before I kill you."

"See I told you he would kill you." Julia insisted causing Dan to let out a huff.

Dan stood up from the chair ignoring the way his knees protested not liking standing after such a long time spent in a short makeup chair.

He pressed a kiss Julia's forehead his voice a bit firm as he gave an order. "Just sit down and take it easy. I'll help you pack up your stuff when we're done shooting for the day."

Julia was tempted to protest but didn't have a chance as Brian decided to back Dan up all too happy to use the nickname Dan had deposited on her soon after they'd started dating. "Take it easy Jewels."

"I'm not totally helpless you know. Being knocked up doesn't make me incapable of movement. That's not how pregnancy works." Julia replied not getting a response as both men left the trailer.

She rolled her eyes not surprised that her protests were ignored. Dan had become a bit of an overprotective nut since she'd gotten pregnant. It was sweet of course but he drove her a little bananas at times.

Brian had been all too eager to join in Dan on the overprotect Julia and drive her crazy game. Julia had a feeling Brian had only joined in because he knew it irritated Julia. Brian lived to irritate the people he held dearest, it was how he showed love.

She guessed she should be grateful that she had so many people who cared about her. Dan's friends with in the Grumps had easily become her own friends. She went shopping with Suzy, Holly, and Brian's wife Rachel all the time, even more so now that she was pregnant. She had the slightest feeling Suzy was enjoying baby toy shopping a little bit too much.

Julia had been a bit worried that Suzy might be a little disappointed when Dan and she had asked Brian and Rachel to be the baby's godparents. Thankfully if there had been any hurt feelings within any one else in their friend group Dan had soothed them by making it clear that he wanted everyone to have just as big of an involvement in this baby's life, especially if something were ever to happen to Julia and him.

Julia sat back on the makeup chair for a moment bored out of her mind by not having a task to do. She found herself admiring the engagement ring on her finger. It was simple; a rose gold band with a little solliatre diamond in the center.

The ring wasn't anything extravagant, but it had been exactly what she'd wanted. Dan really did know her. She'd never been the type to want anything too fancy. She was the type who would panic and worry if she had something massive on her finger. She'd be too worried about losing it if it was some massive mess of a ring.

The wedding was only a month away. They had scooted the date up once she'd gotten pregnant. They just hoped it didn't look as though they were having a shotgun wedding.

They were keeping things simple. It was just going to be a small backyard wedding in Arin and Suzy's backyard. Dan's family was coming down from New Jersey and Julia's family was coming over from Louisiana.

Dan and she could admit that they were nervous; this was the first time their familes would meet. Dan had been trying to reassure her that it would go well but she still couldn't help but to worry.

Dan and she would be honeymooning in New Zealand. She had never been but Dan had.

She could admit the nerd in her was excited given that New Zealand was were the Lord of the Rings films had been filmed. She had the feeling Dan was just as excited about this fact though.

They really were a couple of nerds.

They had decided that they wanted to put most of their money towards their honeymoon. They'd rather have the experience of a nice honeymoon someone different than a big wedding.

Julia dared to leave the trailer deciding she at least deserved a little can of ice cold ginger ale from the craft table an intern had set up early this morning.

As Julia headed back to the makeup trailer satisfied to have a cold fizzy drink in hand, she found herself catching wind of a bit of gossiping.

She almost resisted the urge to eavesdrop on the conversation happening behind the trailer that had been reserved for costumes, but as hard as she tried she couldn't make her feet move away from the conversation.

Julia quickly recognized the voices as belonging to the two models who had been hired to play sexy aliens for the video. Julia had of course rolled her eyes ever so slightly at this vision, but had kept her mouth shut about it. She wasn't the director after all.

Julia had thought that her fiancé filming with models and porn stars alike for Ninja Sex Party's music videos would bother her more than it did. She'd quickly realized that Dan got attention from the female population pretty quickly after they'd begun to date.

He worked with porn stars and models to shoot the music videos of course. He had more than a few female fans.

Thankfully everyone had always been pretty respectful of Dan's and her relationship at least. To be honest Julia had kind of found the fact that he had fans kind of cool. Dan was so sweet to his fans. She hadn't expected anything less from him.

The porn star and model thing surprisingly hadn't bothered her at all, not really. The women were usually respectful of the fact that Dan had a girlfriend and now that he was engaged.

She'd quickly realized that she could trust Dan to be faithful.

It helped of course that Dan was respectful of everyone. He treated people all equally no matter what their job title was. He saw people as being people at the end of the day.

It was one of the things that had made her fall for Dan in the first place; his kindness. He wasn't the type to judge anyone. He always tried to treat everyone with the kindness and respect he'd want for himself.

He'd hired the models but was respectful enough not to allow the videos to take the route of having any of them rub against him or anything like that. Yes, they were sexy in the videos but he wasn't the type to grind against them just for the excuse of making a video. He treated them like human beings instead of sex objects.

Julia had admired that. She should have known not to be shocked by it. Dan's grandmother and his mother had placed a high expectancy to respect others on Dan as he was growing up.

Even if Julia didn't feel jealous one of the models hired for this particular video had rubbed Julia the wrong way. The tall blonde had been shooting Julia shitty looks from the second she'd realized that Julia was Dan's fiancé.

Dan didn't notice it of course. His mind was too locked on working to make the video perfect. He almost got tunnel vision when it came to work.

Julia had made the decision not to bring up the model's obvious dislike of her to Dan. She didn't want to come across as being the overly jealous fiancée.

She'd never been the type to complain about Dan getting attention from women and she sure as hell wasn't going to start now. She trusted Dan too much to complain or fuss over it.

Julia frowned as she heard the distinct Californian accent belonging to the blonde, Sierra was her name or at least Julia was sure that was the name she'd been told. "I just don't get what he sees in her."

"I don't know. He seems to really love her. I mean the way he looks at her…. he adores her. You can see it." The other voice sounded out sounding a bit more nasally. Julia cringed at this voice knowing it belonged to the other model Ivy.

Ivy was a shorter girl who was a bit plainer without the makeup she'd insisted Julia smack onto her. She was a pretty girl of course but she was almost too much when it came to makeup and hair extensions and fake nails.

Sierra on the other hand was so clearly one of those girls who had been blessed with gorgeous looks from birth and she knew it. She was tall thin and blonde and blessed with a pretty perfectly symmetrical face. She was the type of girl who expecting things because she was beautiful. She was used to getting what she wanted.

Ivy was so clearly submissive in her friendship with Sierra. Sierra was easily the type to take dominance of whatever situation she was in.

Sierra let out a huff sounding annoyed that Ivy would dare disagree with her. "Whatever. She sucks at makeup. Do you see my eyes? They look so stupid. It's a bright puke green glittery mess. She did a sloppy job."

Julia felt her stomach drop it quickly hitting her that she was the subject of this bit of gossip.

She wanted to walk away from this conversation before her confidence took a plummet but she kept her feet locked in place her body refusing to corroborate with her mind.

"I think it's supposed to look like that…. we're supposed to be aliens…and you got into the makeup chair late because you wouldn't put your cigarette out." Ivy supplied the comment almost making Julia laugh despite her irritation that she was being talked about behind her back.

Sierra let out a scoff Julia hearing her clearly stomp her heeled shoed foot against the dry desert floor. "She's supposed to be a professional. She clearly isn't up to the task. She probably only got the job because she's riding Dan's dick."

Julia clinched her fists tempted to march around the trailer and slam Sierra's head into the hot metal trailer.

She couldn't make her feet move though as she continued to listen in.

Ivy let out a shrill chuckle at this. "You're so bad."

"Well it's so the truth. That's probably the only reason he asked her to marry him. She totally trapped him into it. You know that's the only way a fatass like her could have gotten a guy like him. She doesn't deserve him. He totally just feels sorry for her now that he knocked her up." Sierra replied a giggle of her own leaving her lips.

Julia's rage faded into sorrow at these words.

A voice in the back of her head told her that the models were full of shit. Dan had proposed to her long before she'd gotten pregnant. Dan loved her. He loved her body. He told her she was sexy. He said he didn't mind the bit of chunk she carried in her thighs and her belly. He'd kissed her chubbier parts more than once insisting he found her stunning.

Dan insisted he worshiped the ground Julia walked on. Suzy and Arin had been eager to point this out to Julia as well.

Julia wasn't sure if it was just exhaustion, the heat, some past insecurities being drug back up, or just perhaps her raging hormones, but she felt her eyes begin to water.

Any desire she'd previously had to break Sierra's nose against the side of the trailer left her body as Julia made her way to the makeup trailer slamming the door behind her.

She wasn't the type to cry like this. She didn't fall apart like this. Julia would have liked to think that her self esteem had improved since high school.

She hadn't been on the thinner side in high school. All of the boys Julia liked had ignored her thanks to her nerdier interests and her chubby body.

As she'd grown older though she had gained confidence both in her geekiness and her body. She'd started to eat healthier and had made an effort to exercise. She hadn't done it to lose weight. She had done it out of a desire to treat herself with more love than she had in the past.

She had escaped her hometown and started a new life for herself, a fresh start to be the type of person she wanted to be.

She had learned how to apply makeup and had gained the confidence to dress the way she wanted. She had taught herself to be proud of herself and to have some confidence in her abilities.

Julia had gone to school to do makeup professionally and had been working hard since then to get her name out there. She had worked hard and it had paid off so far.

She had thought she'd moved past all that self-loathing and self-hatred but here she was crying her eyes out alone holding a can of sugary ginger ale. It was like she was fifteen years old all over again.

She wasn't sure how long she had allowed herself to cry, but it had to have been a while because before she knew it someone was entering the trailer.

Julia widened her eyes making a quick poor attempt to wipe her tears on the sleeve of her hoodie as the door opened a sweaty Dan entering the trailer.

He frowned knowing that he hadn't been expecting to find this when it had come time to finally take a break.

Dan wasted no time to rush to Julia sitting down beside her to the tiny sofa sitting across from the makeup chair. The little trailer was a little cramped but they'd managed to work with the space.

Dan stroked Julia's cheek attempting to soothe her tears. "What's wrong? Are you okay? Is it the baby? Did you get too hot?"

"The baby is fine." Julia replied trying to soothe his worries despite the fact that she couldn't stop her tears.

Dan yanked her even closer to him practically pulling her into his lap. He continued to stroke her cheek more confused than ever by this turn of events.

Yes, he knew she'd been a bit overemotional since she'd become pregnant, but usually she was just weepy over those ASPCA commercials the ones with the sad looking dogs and a celebrity asking for donations. She also got weepy when the dog Dan and she had adopted last Christmas did something cute.

Dan had a distinct feeling she wasn't sobbing over something cute the little Welsh Corgi Pomeranian mix they'd named Arya had done.

"Talk to me baby. What's wrong?"

Julia shook her head whining a bit as Dan moved his hand back to stroke her long hair. "It's so stupid."

"It can't be stupid if it's making you cry." Dan pointed out beginning to rock her ever so slightly as though she was a small child instead of his fiancée.

Julia let out an exasperated huff feeling so dumb as she allowed the words to spill from her lips. "I heard those models that were hired talking about me…. they said I suck at makeup."

Dan furrowed his brow surprised as he felt a bit of rage peak up in his gut. He wasn't the angry type. He was more the type to cry instead of punch. "You know that's not true."

Julia shook her head continuing with her confession. "They said I was only hired because…because I'm I quote riding your dick. They said I trapped you by getting knocked up…that that's the only reason we're engaged. They said I'm a fatass who doesn't deserve you."

She was stunned by the edge in Dan's voice as he spoke. "They're fired. I'm going to talk to the director and we'll reshoot with new talent. No one talks about you like that."

Julia shook her head ignoring the part of herself that wanted to get some vengeance on Sierra and Ivy. It would serve them right having their asses kicked to the curb. "You can't do that. It's ridiculous. I can't let you fire someone just because they hurt my feelings. I promised myself a long time ago I wasn't going to be that psychotic controlling girlfriend that got jealous over other girls."

"And you aren't that controlling girl. You're going to be my wife and no one talks about my future wife that way…especially when she's the mother to my kid." Dan insisted his lips pressing to her forehead.

He was quick to speak again a heavy huff escaping his lips as he came up with a good compromise. "I'll see if there's any way we can be done filming with the models. There's got to be a way we can fix anything wonky in post. I'll talk to the director and figure something out."

He spoke yet again before Julia had another chance to protest. "I frankly don't want to be force to be anywhere near them right now baby girl. Like I said no one talks about you that way and doesn't have to face consequences."

"You can't fire everyone who's mean to me…You can't get revenge on everyone who makes me cry…if you did that you'd have to take vengeance on most of the people I went to high school with." Julia attempted to joke realizing that there was no way she was talking Dan out of kicking Ivy and Sierra to the curb.

Dan let out a small huff giving her a small playful smile. "I can try. Write down some names and I'll make a few calls. I'll stick Brian on the case. He's capable of making anyone cry with just a few words."

Julia shook her head a small sigh escaping her lips as her tears began to dry. "You're a ridiculous man."

"And you love me for it." Dan replied his lips pressing to hers.

He spoke again continuing to rock her ever so slightly. "You know those girls are full of shit, right? I love you. I love everything about you. You're probably the best thing that's ever happened to me. If anything, I'm the one that doesn't deserve you. You've stuck by me when I've worked myself to exhaustion and have come home a drowsy disoriented mess. You laugh at my raunchy jokes. You like my tall awkward body and my freaky thumbs. You love me enough to actually marry me and have my baby. Just never doubt that I love you Jewels. I love you so much."

Julia felt herself tear up again this time for a much more pleasant reason. She pressed her lips to Dan's overwhelmed with the love she had for him. "I know. I love you too. I love you so much."

The couple was interrupted by their loving exchange by Brian stepping into the trailer. The older man frowned at Julia's wet cheeks. "Who hurt you?"

Dan was quick to speak providing the answers. "Those models were being shitty…she overheard them talking about her and my kid. They're fired. There's no way I'm putting up with that bullshit. We can talk to the director about it."

Brian kept his face monotone but Julia could spot a hint of anger in his pale blue eyes. "Do you want me to kill them for you?...I could make it look like an accident…just a little trip and they'll fall off a canyon."

Julia managed to laugh at this offer shaking her head slightly as she replied. "No thanks. I don't think Dan and I want to take our kid to visit his or her godfather in prison."

"I never said I'd get caught." Brian grumbled as he made his way to the tiny bathroom.

Dan pressed his lips to Julia's the pair chuckling at Brian's response. "I love you."

She smiled her hand reaching up to caress his cheek. "I love you too."

She frowned ever so slightly as she pulled back from the kiss and spotted the slight smear to his makeup. "I think you need to get back in the chair…you're a mess."

Dan giggled at this reluctantly allowing her to pull from him. He had to wonder how long he could stay in the makeup chair this time around.


End file.
